i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
