Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
