Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
you made out with another girl for some wings
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
