You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
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She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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