and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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