Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Randomize