sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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