yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Randomize
