Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
