i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Randomize
