And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
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