I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
