But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
