Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
