Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
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