no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Randomize
