Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize