bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize