I must be too annoying 4 u.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
