When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
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