My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
