he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
