How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I met the friendliest cop last night
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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