Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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