it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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