Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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