I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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