i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
