This is evicking siegelnvs
This is fucking ridiculous*
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
You Wouldn’t Guess That These 25 Celebrities Are Complete A**holes
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.