i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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