Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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