so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
