Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
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I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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