Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
