Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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