Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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