I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Boobs are out for the taking
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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