Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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