I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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