Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Randomize
