i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
