I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Please, let me fuck your mom
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
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