If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.