don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.