why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
