Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.

(267): View more from Pennsylvania

I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.

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(661): View more from California

Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.

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(530): View more from California

both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.

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(604): View more from British Columbia

mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.

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If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
Read it at the TFLN blog
(918): View more from Oklahoma

In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.

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(207): View more from Maine

You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.

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(618): View more from Illinois

Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.

(309): View more from Illinois

Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?

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(712): View more from Iowa

ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.

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(225): View more from Louisiana

My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.

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