Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
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i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
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My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.