so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize