I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Randomize
