im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
