If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Randomize
