You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
