I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
She announced her abortion via fbk
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
