there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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